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All Stardew Valley Bachelors, Ranked | Game RantDorian SpencerGame Rant – Feed

All Stardew Valley Bachelors, Ranked | Game Rant
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In Stardew Valley, you are a disgruntled office worker sick and tired of the corporate rate race. To remedy this, our protagonist moves to a secluded little town to live on their late grandfather’s farm. The town in question, Pelican Town, is teeming with unique citizens ready to befriend.

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As the office-worker-turned-farmer gets to know the townies, romance presents itself. In total there are 12 romanceable characters–6 men, 6 women.  Every potential suitor is amazing in their own way, but there is a definite hierarchy. By taking a deep dive into the nature of the bachelors, we can discern which of these men is most worth your time. From least appealing to most, the hierarchy ensues!

6 Shane

Shane is an aspiring film director, but his mindless job at Joja Mart leaves him feeling empty. To fill the void, Shane starts to drink. A lot. When you meet him, Shane is a depressed alcoholic who feels he has no reason to live. He’s distant and aloof, feeling like the world doesn’t want him.

In fact, during his character arc, Shane tries to commit suicide. Luckily, his suicide attempt proves to be a wake-up call and he starts going to therapy, taking steps to stop drinking! He becomes intent on improving himself and contributing to the world in whatever ways he can, whether it be caring for his niece or raising baby chickens.

However, choosing to marry Shane fundamentally changes his story. Instead of staying on the road to recovery, Shane quits his job and doubles down on his drinking habits. He’s mopey and rude, seemingly reverting back to old habits of pushing away the people he loves. He has his sweet moments but takes considerable steps backward. Shane’s disposition after marriage shows he needs time to work on himself before making a lifelong commitment to a partner. For his sake, steer clear of Shane.

5 Sam

Sam is a musician and skateboard enthusiast with a knack for irritating his mom. He likes to spend most of his time skateboarding around town, playing pool in the pub, or playing guitar in his room. Sam is generous and lovable in a slightly goofy way. No one has ever accused Sam of being too sharp, that’s for sure.

Unfortunately, this lovable doofus has a character arc that is severely lacking. His father is deployed in the military for the first year of the game, but any interesting story beats regarding that strain is given to his kid brother, Vincent. Instead of using his changing family dynamic as a way to grow, Sam doesn’t really react to the stress around him. Plus, many of his heart events are fluff with no substance. There’s a lack of depth of character in Sam, making him a less desirable marriage candidate.

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However, he does have some romantic beats, too. Sneaking into his room for a date is a sweet moment, even if it gets awkward when his mom barges in.

4 Alex

Alex is an aspiring pro gridball player with more muscles than brains, although he does show insecurity about his lack of intelligence. It would be easy to pigeonhole Alex as a stereotype, but as you get to know him you learn that he has a big heart.

Once the protagonist gets to know Alex, he becomes surprisingly vulnerable. Throughout his arc, Alex tells the player about his abusive father and his mother’s death. Once comfortable, he lives with his heart on his sleeve, making him endearing. Additionally, when playing as a man, watching Alex struggle with internalized homophobia and coming to terms with having feelings for the protag showcases strength of character.

Unfortunately, there are some pretty lackluster moments during Alex’s romance. His date is arguably one of the worst in the game. Additionally, Alex eventually gives up on his dream of becoming a pro gridball player, and watching him sadly reminisce about what could have been is depressing.

3 Elliott

Elliott is an aspiring novelist who lives in a cabin by the sea, which is just as picturesque as it sounds. Elliott’s incredibly intelligent and passionate, often waxing poetic about whatever strikes his fancy. He’s ambitious and chases his dream, even if he may get discouraged now and then. Plus, he’s incredibly kind and sensitive, making him likable.

Most of Elliott’s arc is concerning his own self-doubt. Coming from a hometown where nobody believed in him, he values the protags’ encouragement. He appreciates it so much that when he finally finishes his novel he dedicates it to the farmer! Elliott opens up quickly to the protag, considering the farmer to be a good friend almost immediately.

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However, Elliott’s fatal flaw is that he’s a bit too perfect. When married, Elliott always tells the farmer how blessed he is to have them in his life, always doting and idyllic. This is sweet, but there’s a distinct lack of realism here. Elliott’s melodrama and perfection can become exhausting and grating over time when it’s not balanced out with any character flaws. Elliott is marriage material, but the constant showering of affection can be a bit suffocating.

2 Harvey

Harvey is Stardew Valley’s resident doctor, intelligent and sensitive. Frequently, Harvey shows himself to be quite the anxious nerd. He’s a bit socially oblivious (as shown when he didn’t understand the farmer’s flirting during his 2 heart event), but his dorkiness makes him endearing. Harvey may be a ball of nerves, but he’s incredibly kind and committed to keeping the town healthy.

Unfortunately, the first parts of Harvey’s arc are pretty boring. At first, you just get to see him playing doctor rather than getting to know him. Eventually, his characterizations come in full swing. Between catching him at an aerobics class and stumbling in on him playing on his airplane radio, it’s hard not to love this adorkable doctor. Additionally, Harvey displays impressive maturity and vulnerability. When telling the farmer about his dreams to be a pilot, Harvey is at peace with the fact that that wasn’t in the cards for him.

Things only get better when you go on a date with him. Harvey is blessed with one of the most romantic dates that also progresses his characterization. Additionally, in marriage, Harvey is an absolute joy to have around.

1 Sebastian

When you first meet Sebastian, it’s easy to misconstrue him as a misanthropic, edgy loner. He’s a freelance computer programmer saving up so he can move away from the Valley and struggles to connect with his family and other townies. The initial image the player is given is aloof and indignant.

However, getting to know Sebastian changes this entirely. His character arc is all about the farmer and Sebastian learning to understand one another. Throughout his arc, he works hard to reexamine his goals and desires, eventually realizing that it’s his duty to create his own happiness rather than chase an unattainable “happiness” in the big city. Sebastian’s self-reflective nature and fierce independence showcase maturity some other bachelors don’t possess.

When pursuing a relationship, Sebastian is one of the few marriage candidates who retain their autonomy. He keeps his job, still hangs out with his friends, and enjoys his alone time. Additionally, he speaks frankly about your relationship with him, showcasing an honesty that is unique to his romance. Even married, Sebastian demands his independence in a way that feels tangible and realistic. His romance is based on mutual respect and honesty, making him endearing. Without a doubt, Sebastian is the best bachelor in Stardew Valley.

NEXT: Stardew Valley: The 5 Best (& 5 Worst) Romances

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