People of a certain age and tired disposition will remember Nintendo’s Wi-Fi USB Connector. Before wireless internet connections were a household staple in 2005, this dongle plugged into your computer and provided an access point to Nintendo WiFi Connection for certain Nintendo DS titles, like Mario Kart 7 or Animal Crossing: Wild World. It was awkward, unreliable, and patchy at best – adjectives you could still easily apply to Nintendo’s online output in 2021.
There have been improvements over the years, but it’s always felt like Nintendo has dragged its feet to offer the bare minimum. Splatoon 2’s voice chat was handled in the most needlessly complicated way through an external mobile app, at a time when in-game voice chat was an industry standard. Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is consistently a punching bag too for its poor net code, which caused it to be pulled from fighting game tournaments like EVO (before it was canceled altogether) during the pandemic despite its popularity.
Related: Mario Golf's courses deserve a better storyIn the case of Mario Golf: Super Rush, it’s like developer Camelot hasn’t played any game online over the past decade. There’s no quick matchmaking to speak of. Instead, you’re forced to search for rooms that fit your specifications (whether Speed Golf, Battle Golf, etc.), and cram yourself in. There are no ranking incentives to keep you playing, special tournaments, or even leaderboards. Just pick a room, play a round of golf, and get out.
It’s disappointing and baffling. Even Mario Golf: World Tour for the Nintendo 3DS, released in 2013, had a better online suite with online tournaments. There have been promises of updates to add more courses which might come with additions for online (in the same vein as their previous sports title Mario Tennis Aces), but it’s telling that Nintendo is happy to ship Mario Golf: Super Rush with such primitive online options to begin with. Coupled with a single-player story mode which lasts only around five hours, the glaring shortcomings in longevity are impossible to avoid.
If this was FIFA or NBA 2K21, it would rightly be lambasted against 2021’s standards and expectations. Nintendo’s reputation as an online straggler, however, seems to give them an easy pass even when they’re shockingly below par. It's a company celebrated for doing things its own way, and while that might apply when it comes to console innovations, its dismissive attitude towards online play is simply a stubborn refusal to provide quality services.
It doesn’t have to stretch itself to up its game either. Mario Kart 8 has simple and efficient online functionality, which (outside of no in-game voice chat) provides everything you need to enjoy racing online. Even the dialogue options for your Mii, ranging from “Go easy on me!” to “I’ll get you next time!”, are a charming alternative that offers at least some level of interaction for players in lobbies. There’s some effort and consideration in Mario Kart 8’s online which, depressingly, makes it their best by some margin.
If a game released in 2014 has your most robust online to date, there’s a problem. For any other company, Mario Golf: Super Rush’s barren and careless approach to online would have been crucified. As it is, Nintendo is skating by on the low expectations it has set itself and placed on consumers. In 2021, a year where online has become essential for shared gaming experiences, it’s time we all stopped measuring Nintendo against its own standards.
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